a quote from an episode of LOST
"Let's carpool man. It'll help with global warming, but that hasn't happened yet, so maybe we can prevent it."
-Hurley to the group (who are living in the past, the 70's)
Tuesday, December 15, 2009
Friday, December 11, 2009
I Wonder as I Wander
Hi friends--I'm finally back!!!
So, it has been approximately 4 months since I took my current job; Supervising teenage girls who are in the care of the government (Child Protective Services = CPS) and live in the shelter/home I work at for a transitional period of time. The position started out on a shaky foot, but It has gradually been improving and looks on the upside of things now. I have just about mastered my night shift schedule and am hoping that I will let myself try working the other shifts during the day when I have more responsibility and more importantly have the most interaction with the clients.
I say, "let myself" because if it was up to my boss, I would be working 7am-3pm or 3-11pm too. Personally though, I still do not feel comfortable enough because of my first few weeks on the day shift; alone and feeling like i' d been thrown to the "manipulative" wolves!
Ha. I laugh now but seriously these girls kicked my ass, I am not ashamed to admit it. There are definitely no college courses that could ever have prepared me for what I face at this job and I knew this (on some level) coming into it however it just stinks to feel so helpless and ill-equipped not to have 5 young girls under control...But OH my, these girls are so much more complex than just being teenagers--Not getting into that at this time, just yet.
Other "newness" in Arizona
*Still enjoying every day I can be so near to my sister, brother-in-law and nieces!!
*Training for the Rock n' Roll 1/2 Marathon on January 17th
*Hosted my mother and niece for Thanksgiving for two weeks
*Singing in the University Presbyterian Church choir with Holly and occasionally singing duets together- like at the recent Dessert Christmas concert!
*First time Black Friday shopping and will probably be the last-after 2 hours in line at Kohls.
*Visiting a hospice patient once a week; a.k.a I get to "play" masseuse for twenty minutes haha.
*Found a great counselor with a PH.D. to talk to about life; transitioning, work, and so forth...
*Totally into the shows LOST, So You Think You Can Dance?, GLEE and Deadwood and re-runs on late or in the wee hours of morning (at the shelter on the job, yes) of Will&Grace, Sex&City and Frasier! fun stuff.
**
And lastly, being glad and joyful inside for deleting my facebook account and the constant wasted time spent on such things (no judgement intended-purely a self-reflection) and also for taking on the art of letter-writing to good people back East;) It is in these small ways of being "counter-cultural" that I believe, do bring me my present happiness/fulfimment and have helped me find the real and true pure joys available everyday.
***
For me that has come in the form of--> shared daily life together again after 13 years with a beloved sister and kindred spirit named Holly. Watching and being a part of her children/my nieces who are growing before our eyes. And learning to appreciate another part of the Great Divine's creation that is the dry and mountainous, yet honest, desert.
****
Now, Of course since i absolutely love lyrics and other people's words; I chose to end with a Maroon 5 song entitled, "I'm Through With You"
(sub-text) Yes, this is intended for one male person in particular and is not meant to be cryptic. Neither are they all the things I feel about or towards him. This is simply a strengthening and supportive song for me to declare.
more to myself than to any one else. Thank you very much ;)
Can you see me, Floating above your head
As you lay in bed, Thinking about everything
That you did not do, Cause saying I love you
Has nothing to do with meaning it
And I don't trust you
Cause every time you're here
Your intentions are unclear
I spend every hour waiting for a phone call--That I know will never come.
I used to think you were the one, Now I'm sick of thinking anything at all!
You ain't ever coming back to me
That's not how things were supposed to be
You take my hand just to give it back
No other lover has ever done that
Do you remember
The way we used to melt
Do you remember how it felt
When I touched you -- Oh cause I remember very well
And how long has it been
Since someone you let in
Has given what I gave to you
And at night when you sleep
Do you dream I would be there
Just for a minute or two do you?
You ain't ever coming back to me
That's not how things were supposed to be
You take my hand just to give it back
No other lover has ever done that
Heartache heartache I just have so much
A simple love with a complex touch
There is nothing you can say or do
I called to let you know I'm through with you
I ain't ever coming back to you.
So, it has been approximately 4 months since I took my current job; Supervising teenage girls who are in the care of the government (Child Protective Services = CPS) and live in the shelter/home I work at for a transitional period of time. The position started out on a shaky foot, but It has gradually been improving and looks on the upside of things now. I have just about mastered my night shift schedule and am hoping that I will let myself try working the other shifts during the day when I have more responsibility and more importantly have the most interaction with the clients.
I say, "let myself" because if it was up to my boss, I would be working 7am-3pm or 3-11pm too. Personally though, I still do not feel comfortable enough because of my first few weeks on the day shift; alone and feeling like i' d been thrown to the "manipulative" wolves!
Ha. I laugh now but seriously these girls kicked my ass, I am not ashamed to admit it. There are definitely no college courses that could ever have prepared me for what I face at this job and I knew this (on some level) coming into it however it just stinks to feel so helpless and ill-equipped not to have 5 young girls under control...But OH my, these girls are so much more complex than just being teenagers--Not getting into that at this time, just yet.
Other "newness" in Arizona
*Still enjoying every day I can be so near to my sister, brother-in-law and nieces!!
*Training for the Rock n' Roll 1/2 Marathon on January 17th
*Hosted my mother and niece for Thanksgiving for two weeks
*Singing in the University Presbyterian Church choir with Holly and occasionally singing duets together- like at the recent Dessert Christmas concert!
*First time Black Friday shopping and will probably be the last-after 2 hours in line at Kohls.
*Visiting a hospice patient once a week; a.k.a I get to "play" masseuse for twenty minutes haha.
*Found a great counselor with a PH.D. to talk to about life; transitioning, work, and so forth...
*Totally into the shows LOST, So You Think You Can Dance?, GLEE and Deadwood and re-runs on late or in the wee hours of morning (at the shelter on the job, yes) of Will&Grace, Sex&City and Frasier! fun stuff.
**
And lastly, being glad and joyful inside for deleting my facebook account and the constant wasted time spent on such things (no judgement intended-purely a self-reflection) and also for taking on the art of letter-writing to good people back East;) It is in these small ways of being "counter-cultural" that I believe, do bring me my present happiness/fulfimment and have helped me find the real and true pure joys available everyday.
***
For me that has come in the form of--> shared daily life together again after 13 years with a beloved sister and kindred spirit named Holly. Watching and being a part of her children/my nieces who are growing before our eyes. And learning to appreciate another part of the Great Divine's creation that is the dry and mountainous, yet honest, desert.
****
Now, Of course since i absolutely love lyrics and other people's words; I chose to end with a Maroon 5 song entitled, "I'm Through With You"
(sub-text) Yes, this is intended for one male person in particular and is not meant to be cryptic. Neither are they all the things I feel about or towards him. This is simply a strengthening and supportive song for me to declare.
more to myself than to any one else. Thank you very much ;)
Can you see me, Floating above your head
As you lay in bed, Thinking about everything
That you did not do, Cause saying I love you
Has nothing to do with meaning it
And I don't trust you
Cause every time you're here
Your intentions are unclear
I spend every hour waiting for a phone call--That I know will never come.
I used to think you were the one, Now I'm sick of thinking anything at all!
You ain't ever coming back to me
That's not how things were supposed to be
You take my hand just to give it back
No other lover has ever done that
Do you remember
The way we used to melt
Do you remember how it felt
When I touched you -- Oh cause I remember very well
And how long has it been
Since someone you let in
Has given what I gave to you
And at night when you sleep
Do you dream I would be there
Just for a minute or two do you?
You ain't ever coming back to me
That's not how things were supposed to be
You take my hand just to give it back
No other lover has ever done that
Heartache heartache I just have so much
A simple love with a complex touch
There is nothing you can say or do
I called to let you know I'm through with you
I ain't ever coming back to you.
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